A Day of Angst

Warning: The following post may contain anger and unhappiness towards the world

How was my day today, you ask?? Oh simply splendid my dears, just splendid! For those of you who didn't catch it, that last statement was completely sarcastic and untrue. I had one of those days where it starts off fairly well and it seems like a precurser to a fantastic day, but it's all a lie. Like on Christmas, where you see a huge box and you're thinking it's the karoake machine you've been begging your parents for and you open it up and it's just a pair of socks cruely disguised. That was my day. Let the tale begin....

How I woke up should have been indication to how this day was going to go. I had my alarm set for 8:50am so I could be up by 9. I tend to hit my snooze button twice before getting up, so I set my alarm to accommodate for that. I was woken up by a text, at 8:06, from Kat asking me if I was going to the game this weekend (OSU is playing ASU at home). Well, going back to sleep was impossible after that so I decided to get up and start getting ready. I needed to get a parking pass, so I figured it was all good. I dressed and did my hair and makeup with the following results:

I felt like I looked decent so I thought today would be a great day. Well I got to campus and went straight to the Transit and Parking Services office. I waited in line for 15 minutes before arriving at the counter. I told the lady that I'd sent my application for a permit in and she looked at me like I'd grown a second head. "Oh!" she said like she'd never heard of such a thing, or perhaps she just wasn't used to Type A overachievers such as myself. Either way, I found it odd. She came back and said she couldn't find my application. That confused and upset me as I know I sent it in. But, fortunately, she was nice about it and just had me fill out a portion of the form and gave me my parking pass--which cost me $186!

I left Adams Hall (where TAPS is located) and went to find a parking spot in my usual lot. What do I find? A full lot. "No matter" thought I, I'll just drive to the back of the lot, there's always spots there. Do I find any? No. There are none to be found...ANYWHERE! I drove around for 15 minutes trying to find a spot. Finally, I flip a u-turn in the middle of 15th St and whip into a metered parking spot. The bad? The meter is only for 2 hours. It's 10:44. I have a class at 11 and noon. There is no way I'm making it back in time before the meter expires. But do I care at this point? No. This bears saying: I'm not wearing great walking shoes. I was wearing leather boots with fur inner lining with a heel. So I'm practically sprinting across campus to make it to Organic Chemistry on time. By the time I reach my class, with two minutes to spare, my feet are one massive blister. Walking back to my car after my last class was literally a pain.

I left school at 1:15 after waiting in line for a football ticket, to a game which I will probably not go! I got home and did some chemistry review work. It wasn't much of a review seeing as I did not know how to do about half of it. That looks promising for me, no?? Felt like a champ! After completing the problems, I left for my horrible volleyball game. From the minute I walked in the gym, the referee seemed to have it out for me. She disrespected my position as coach, looked down upon me because of my age, and was just downright rude. I'm a passive aggressive person. It takes a lot to piss me off, but boy was she good at it. It didn't help that I was already stressed and not in a good mood, but she really knew how to shorten my fuse. I nearly went off on her. I've never been so mad after a game, even when I played! And I got intense when I played. It took me hours to calm down.

This day was just full of anger, angst, and stress. It has really taken its toll on me. I was exhausted at about 7:30. Those negative feelings really affect a person. You don't realize how much until you just want to lay on the floor, curl into a ball and rock back and forth. I felt so helpless today, like I'd fallen into a well and was slowly drowning while the world watched and some poured water on top of me. It's an awful feeling. Even Zach had trouble cheering me up. I was really down in the dumps today. It's really hard to get out of that rut once you've fallen in. It's like the saying "I've fallen and I can't get up!" Except, I'm not an old lady that's broken her hip, but you get the point.

The positive of my day? I went to another jewlery party at Debbie's house. I'd seen the show yesterday, but it was still fun to see it again, and watch Debbie excel at her first presentation. I simply love that jewlery, and MUST have some at one point. Thank goodness I'm hosting my own party in October! That house always seems to relax me. I love it there!

So while my day was mostly negative, it ended on a positive which is where I'm hoping tomorrow will start and stay even though I have to work. I'm really hoping to not have another negative day tomorrow. I can't take many of those. They wear a person out quickly. But it is time for me to say goodnight and go to bed soon. I have a class at 9 tomorrow, I have to be up by 7. Yay me!